Mandatory Fun!!
Mandatory Fun!!

You WILL have fun!!!

News: Posted April 23rd, 2019 by Alina

^ 46 Comments to “Mandatory Fun!!”

  1. HousePet Says:

    Crag somehow called himself “Craig”.
    This is probably not the first report. XD

    Posted April 23rd, 2019 at 9:01 pm
  2. argentlupus Says:

    *snrk* after the heaviness of the last few pages, I like seeing them like this!

    Posted April 23rd, 2019 at 9:12 pm
  3. Hfar Says:

    Fun? Fun?! You expect us to have FUN?!! How dare you!

    Posted April 23rd, 2019 at 9:31 pm
  4. DocMcConvoy Says:

    Sorry if this is only my opinion, but this Strip totaly feels like: “We bugged into Marks personal matters till he flipped the table, and now since we have messed up big time, let’s totally forget about him and have fun.”
    Can’t say I am totally ok with this. As much as I don’t like the drama, I hope we get back to Mark and what happens to him now soon.

    Posted April 23rd, 2019 at 9:49 pm
  5. Daniel S. Mountain Says:

    So Abbie dropped the boots for her costume?

    Posted April 23rd, 2019 at 9:52 pm
  6. “Not really, but no sense worrying about it.” BURN for Mark. I hope this does not go badly for him.

    Posted April 23rd, 2019 at 10:06 pm
  7. Hfar Says:

    @Daniel S. Mountain Abbie’s character has been bootless/shoeless since at least the previous session.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 12:16 am
  8. Paperiahma Says:

    @DocMcConvoy I understand where you’re coming from, but on the other hand, what could they do? They put their game on hold and tried to help Mark, who was clearly distressed. They tried their best but it didn’t work. Clearly this is not the time to try to talk to him so what should they do? Sit the rest of the game out sulking and quite possibly dampening/ruining other people’s games in the process? I see this as more of a “There’s nothing we can do to help this situation right now, might as well keep up the game and have a bit of fun until things calm down.” I don’t think they’re disregarding Mark but thinking that he needs to calm down for now without them.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 4:11 am
  9. Oneironaut Says:

    @Gene Wirchenko – I think it’s more a case of them knowing he’s better off left alone until he’s cooled off and his emotions aren’t so raw. At least enough for him to be able to talk it out without the conversation feeling like a stroll through a minefield.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 7:12 am
  10. Will Says:

    @DocMcConvoy How were they responsible for him flipping the table? He was already flipping the table. Dustin just gave him a target. And I’m sorry that they were concerned with a friend and attempted to help? I’m pretty sure if they -hadn’t- come to help, certain people would have found fault there too.

    When this kind of thing happens, what are they supposed to do? Sit around moping until Mark gets his head firmly out of his ass with his self-inadequacy and jealousy? They tried to be there for him, but he wanted none of it unless they completely agreed with his unfounded issues with Damien.

    It’s okay to worry about your friends, but when they don’t want help and only want to wallow, you can’t just sit around waiting for them, and you shouldn’t stop yourself from your once a month game to wait until they may or may not improve. There’s only so much they could do without outright just telling Ravenia (which is a huge no no) and they did it at this point.

    Mark dug his hole, they attempted to lend him a hand out of it, he just slapped it away and dug deeper.

    Ya, I get Mark is going through some stuff, but having hard to deal with emotions doesn’t relieve you from the consequences of what you do when you have them. It seems like the gang is ready to forgive him when he comes down, but that doesn’t mean they can’t live their lives while they do it.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 8:25 am
  11. ShuxTehUber Says:

    I see everyone’s actually having fun now, without Mark making them miserable.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 10:46 am
  12. DocMcConvoy, you and I are on the same page, but your paragraph stated it much better. Kudos.

    I really do not like the way that Mark is being thrown away.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 11:40 am
  13. Eva Says:

    What a fascinating divide in the comments.

    Clearly different people have very different answers to “whose responsibility is Mark’s disaster meltdown?” Hmmmm…

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 5:22 pm
  14. Will, Dustin tried lecturing Mark. How did he think that would work out? Dustin already had a good example to follow. (Joel interacted with Dustin much much better after Dustin lost his character to shenanigans.) I think the rest of the group is being very quick to abandon Mark. And look at all of that OOC just outside the OOC room.

    Eva, Mark is responsible for his meltdown, but others have definitely contributed to the situation.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 6:50 pm
  15. An additional note: I am surprised that Abbie is not trying to do anything for Mark. She already has a connection with him. Her passivity in the matter is nearly WSOD-blowing for me.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 6:55 pm
  16. fromtheothersideofthefence Says:

    @Will
    Sorry, but what you are describing is nothing like what happened.
    Mark had issues, sure, but he keep them to himself except to tell Abbie privately, on confidence.
    Then, at the first sight of distress, Mark was told to stop playing and go away, by the same person he confided in, who actually outed his personal issues to the rest of the group.
    Then came Dustin, who tried to cointain Mark´s emotions instead of adressing the issues.
    To be honest, i think he has more right to feel offended about how they handled this issue than being angry with Damien or Ravenia.
    But ultimetely, Mark should start respecting himself more.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 7:04 pm
  17. fromtheothersideofthefence Says:

    I think Abbie should make herself responsable for insolating Mark by being with him. You don´t get the right of sending someone to “cool off” without the responsability of making sure they are Ok. You don´t get to do that to adults, specially not ones you respect.

    Sure, she´ll miss the game, but like Freud said, “No one who, like me, conjures up the most evil of those half-tamed demons that inhabit the human breast, and seeks to wrestle with them, can expect to come through the struggle unscathed.”

    And that´s what she did when she sended him to face his demons alone, she conjured something she was not willing to wrestle with. She may be acting on good intentions, and that´s good, but ultimately she is not handling it very well.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 7:25 pm
  18. Will Says:

    @Gene

    The only way Dustin could have made Mark happy was if he had agreed that Mark’s jealousy was founded and that would be unhealthy in so many ways. And a lie. That is the only way Mark wouldn’t have blown up. Dustin tried to defuse multiple times but Mark took it as an insult every single time. Your idea works if Mark was willing to listen to anyone at all, but at this point he’s not.

    The girls could have gone in but to what point? Wasting their night listening to him complain about how Ravenia’s primary is awful? Please don’t forget, Abbie -tried- to get him to talk about the issues he was having about another thing, and it was like prying teeth.

    How are the others not going in to deal with a Mark who wants nothing more than to find someone other than him to be mad at abandoning him? They’re still his friends. That doesn’t mean they have to enter the line of fire. They’re going to be there for him. Just not while he’s in a mood that the only good answer is the most unhealthy one for him.

    Also, Mark doesn’t need anyone else in the room right now. He needs to figure this out, and it doesn’t look like he’s going to do it with other people in the room.

    Posted April 24th, 2019 at 11:43 pm
  19. Glen Says:

    Did… did the OOC drama go on so long that the seasons changed? I swear at the beginning of the session she said it was Winter.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 1:13 am
  20. Jess Says:

    @Gene

    I also wondered why Abbie didn’t come after Mark to talk to him – until 2 comics ago, when it was became clear that Mark and Dustin were having their conversation in the men’s bathroom/changing room. That’s why Abbie asked Dustin to speak to him. I am 100% certain that if Mark had been in the OOC area – or in any gender neutral space – she would have come to talk to him herself. (And she probably would have done a better job of helping him than Dustin in my opinion).

    I see this as yet another instance of Mark causing problems for himself. Despite the fact that he wanted to talk to Abbie about his troubles earlier, at the point when he would have had an opportunity to do so – he deliberately chose to go to a part of the building where Abbie couldn’t follow him. Possibly he was grumpy about Abbie and Katie making him take a time out when he wouldn’t admit to himself that he needed one and that’s why he went to the men’s room. Or possibly he went there to avoid meeting Ravenia. Maybe both.

    This lack of self awareness is typical Mark though. The sensible thing to do would have been to admit to himself and to Abbie that it was bothering him a lot more than he thought and that he can’t wait until tomorrow to talk about it. And then the two of them take a time out and go find somewhere quiet and he talks it over with her. But Mark refuses to admit this to himself and thus we end up here.

    As someone who – like Mark here – used to refuse to admit that something was bothering me until I exploded about it… well into adulthood… (and then spent years learning healthier ways of dealing with things)… I say that this is all Mark. There is nothing friends can do to help you when you refuse to admit you need help. Friends can try to help, as we saw Mark’s friends do here, but it won’t do any good if the person they are trying to help isn’t willing to admit they have a problem.

    A small side note:
    Given that Mark is in the men’s room, and given the potential for drama that it would cause… what are the odds of Damien going in there to use the bathroom and Mark blowing up at him? I’m thinking – very likely! (But I would be happy to be pleasantly surprised by Damien encountering Mark there leading to a different outcome).

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 1:42 am
  21. Kat Says:

    Sometimes people need time alone to vent. I’m actually one of those people. i don’t deal well with people getting near me when i’m under stress. I tend to lash out. Give me some time alone with some Disturbed or Evanescence (depending on the type of meltdown) in a dark room and I’ll come out and talk about it when I’m ready. But it took me a while to realize that’s what I needed. Given Mark’s highly emotional reaction to someone attempting to talk to him about his problem, they probably think he needs some time alone. Remember that only Dustin and Mark know what was said, others only see that Dustin tried to talk to him about it and got an emotional explosion in response. They might not assume “Dustin talked to him wrong” before “Mark needs some time to cool off.”

    One of the things about Weregeek is that all the characters are flawed in their own ways, just like real people. So someone making a mistake is kinda par for the course and normal.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 2:15 am
  22. Jess Says:

    Unrelated to all the drama – I just went back and reread the past few months to refresh my memory of this storyline and I found a continuity error. When this game started (before Mark went off for a time out) Katie says it’s winter, be careful of the winter king, etc – but now she’s saying it’s spring.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 2:19 am
  23. Shinjischneider Says:

    @Gene i completely can’t agree with you.

    They did literally EVERYTHING they could. They sent Mark away to the OOC-Room.

    After a while, when he didn’t come out and actually dug himself in deeper, they sent him the only person who might be able to relate to the situation. Dustin.

    Mark first ranted against Damien and when Dustin rightfully told Mark, to question why he actually was mad at Damien and that Dustin had to deal with the sort of feelings Mark has right now for years, Mark lashed out at him.

    When they saw that nothing they could do would calm down the situation. They did the next sensible thing. Leave him be. Leave him sort this out himself.

    And yes. Having fun without him is part of that.

    Mark is not a victim to group dynamics. He’s a grown man in a relationship meltdown lashing out at others because he can’t deal with his own emotions and thoughts.

    The only thing i actually DO worry about is, that they didn’t set up a guard next to the OOC-Room. Because i can already tell that the next thing that is going to happen will be Ravenia and/or Damien walking into the OOC-Room and shit blows up.

    OR… they come to the group, Damien is interacting with them right when Mark comes back and he flips his shit completely.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 3:34 am
  24. DocMcConvoy Says:

    Ok, since my point only seem to have come over at half it’s value to some, I think I need to clarify this:
    It it not what they do now that I don’t like, it is how they are doing it.

    I am totally ok, that they see, that right now, they can’t do anything for Mark. Also, returning to the game is not the problem at all. And also that they play their characters straight afterwards is something I find good, because thats what you are supposed to do, when you take gaming serious. The bubble I am really troubled with is the one with “No sense worrying.”

    From my point of view, they should worry. Not so much about Mark but about what they actually had done. Let me recap a little: Mark was troubled at the start and even reached out to Abbie for a talk. Actually a good thing. Mark acknowlegeds, he has a problem and needs somebody to talk about. And first this seems like a good plan, but it has a little twist: Abbie is by nature an Action Girl. She likes to solve problems fast and when they are at hand. Nothing bad with that at all, but it invites her to step up faster the moment when mark has his little breakdown over the visitors giggling. I made a Comment back then, giving Abbie credit for that, and hoping that Cathie stays out of this. Much to my dismay, it was she who dragged Cathie into this, to send Mark to the OOC-Room in a Gilligan Cut. And there he is left alone. Now that is something I have a problem with.

    Abbie felt the responsibility to act. Good thing. Getting help to send him in a place to think. It`s ok, since Cathie stayed out of the OCC-Room. But sending in Dustin was the wrong choice in my opinion. If I would have been Abbie at that point, I would have given Mark some time to cool down and then go in there myself. I would have sat down and simply asked, if it is a little better now, and if he meinds I stay a little. If no, I would have left and showed up a little later again. If yes, I would have asked, if he wants to talk about it. And I would hear him out completely before I start analyzing his situation from a clearly made objective point of view. I would try not to give actual advice, but try to get Mark to get the right ideas by himself. Sending in Dustin instead and making it look like he came by occasionaly while listening in doesn’t give lots of I-take-responsibility-points in my book.

    And also, sorry to say, but Dustin was not the best choice for this also. He seems the obvious choice, cause he is in a situation near to Marks you could assume, but therein lies the mistake. What he needs is not someone with the same problem solved by some means, he needs an objective person helping him from a distance. not a close friend, and even more not someone in the same polycule. At least not, as long it is not discussed with the whole polycule. Other things aside, Dustin already showed some lack in dealing with some situations, looking at how he couldn’t come to terms with his long time friend over his ruling in the vampire game. My choice would have been Craig. A friend thats not to close, who can take an objective look at things, help him sort them out, without the urge to bug in to much like or use a hammer to nail things the way she think is right like Cathie.

    Well, thats my opinion what would have been best, but thats not the point. But I would wish for those that were in front of that room to take some time to think about what they have done, and where things went wrong. And for Abbie, returning to the game is actually a no-no. She started it, so it would be her responsibility to stay in front of the room and make another attempt later, since she still has the option to do that, since she sent in Dustin instead of going herself.

    Ok, now you can tell me where I am wrong, but as a last point to take into consideration: I said I feels. I Only have a feeling, thats nothing certain. And everone can feel something different. I also don’t claim to be in the right here. I just say it feels to me like that.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 7:27 am
  25. Guest Says:

    I got the impression it was a male locker room, so how would Abbie help by going in there?

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 7:38 am
  26. Charlotte Says:

    I think it was nice of the group to try to help, but I honestly don’t think it was all that helpful. Giving Mark some space is the right thing to do in this situation imo.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 8:33 am
  27. Charlotte Says:

    As to this discussion about “abandoning Mark” — he has full responsibility for himself in this situation. I don’t see why the others should stop playing because he’s unhappy. If he comes to them for help, they’ll help (and I’m sure they’ll interrupt the game for it!).

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 8:35 am
  28. ShuxTehUber Says:

    Mark knew what he was getting into, it is not anybody else’s fault if he is incapable of getting over himself.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 12:39 pm
  29. Joe Says:

    Mark was being destructive and selfish. He was mean to Justin. He doesn’t realize it, but he wants to punish the whole gaming group for him not being the only one for Ravenia.

    The only thing you can do when someone is like this is put them on the back of your head and not let them ruin a good thing. Mark is endangering his reputation and his relationships, and he lacks the emotional resilience to rein himself. He shouldn’t had even attended; he should’ve put an acceptable excuse (“My gaming guild needs me for this raid/family dinner/whatevs”) and attend only after his emotional thing was in order.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 12:58 pm
  30. Nep Says:

    Yeah no, it is literally Mark’s own job to manage his emotions. If he wants someone to talk to, he knows where they are. It would be more disruptive to the entire group for this party to do anything but return to the game.

    They tried, it failed, not their job to make sure Mark can engage in a voluntary activity without bringing everyone else down with him.

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 2:26 pm
  31. FairyGothMama Says:

    Gene, Abbie was the first person to notice he was off. She suggested he step out of the game to sort his head so he could come back and enjoy himself. She was part of the reason Dustin went in to talk to him. (BTW, I didn’t see it as lecturing. I think Dustin was trying to commiserate with his feelings of inadequacy, while trying to get him to understand what they are and not what he thinks they are.) If Mark isn’t in a head space to listen, then what should she do?

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 8:37 pm
  32. Will, you are moving the goalposts. I do not think anyone seriously thinks that a handling at this point would result in Mark being happy, but it might help defuse the situation. Sometimes, just being there helps. (Which, in case anyone is about to suggest it, Dustin did not do.)

    Posted April 25th, 2019 at 11:37 pm
  33. Jolly Red Giant Says:

    Honestly, polyamory isn’t for everyone. I don’t judge people in polyamorous relationships AT ALL (except sometimes to marvel at their time management skills) but I don’t think everyone is cut out for it. Perhaps everyone would be if our culture didn’t have monogamy as the default expectation, but it does and that’s where we are.

    The graceful thing for Mark to do here is to excuse himself from the evening’s event, then later have an honest conversation with Ravenna in which he tells her that this sort of relationship isn’t for him. I don’t fault him for getting into it, but it’s time to get out of it for everyone’s sake.

    This arc has been painful to read. I like Mark as a character, but right now he’s acting like a jerk, and I feel like it’s going to get worse before it gets better.

    Posted April 26th, 2019 at 10:44 am
  34. Antheridium Says:

    So… just a few minutes ago in-game, the Winter king was in charge; now it’s the Spring monarch?

    Posted April 26th, 2019 at 7:45 pm
  35. Jolly Red Giant, I think that there are more jerks around than Mark. Some are inadvertent, but that type can have effects, too.

    As to the half-hidden factor of poly: I feel that too many people are pushing poly and attacking Mark to push that agenda. I am not interested in poly, but if this is anything like typical poly dynamics, it does make poly look very bad. Consider the optics, folks. There is a big difference between “It is not for me, but let them be.” and “It looks to be a destructive lifestyle.”

    Posted April 26th, 2019 at 11:51 pm
  36. fromtheothersideofthefence Says:

    I think the criticism of the groups dinamics are often confused with criticism of polyamory, despite not being the same thing.
    i feel like I am of the side of analyzing the dynamics of the group, often calling out what i think are valueable alternative points of view to the narrative we are being presented; even if such points of view are often critical of the behavior of the characters.
    I say this, because it´s often speculated that people like me are not on the side of poly relationships, something I find very funny, considering i have been in some of those relationships, though often using a very diferent way of understanding such situations.
    For example, i often critizice Dustin on the way he understands the relationship, and will point out that categorizing people in such rigid categories such as “primary” or “secondary” is wrong; let alone identifying with such categories such as “secondary” to himself, wich he somehow sees as a sign of self steem…

    The same happens with Abbie. Perhaps it´s a cultural diference from where I come from, but the emotional necesities of a friend will often come before social standing and comfort, let alone entertaiment. Mark didn´t “explode” with Dustin or during the middle of the game. Instead, he was preassured to leave, to the point of outing his issues to do it. I do care that Abbie tried to do the best she can, and acted out of care for everyone involved. But when her interest to help a friend in distress became inconvinient for the group, she ended up causing the very same problems Mark was probably trying to avoid in the first place.

    If there is one thing i could ask the autor of the comic, is that while I like Mark, i don´t think I respect him, considering him the perpetual noob, always like a fish out of water, and with what it seems too little insight about himself. I would like to come to respect him and see him grow. And I think that when and if that happens, perhaps we all will understand him a little better.

    Posted April 27th, 2019 at 2:52 am
  37. Pandorym Says:

    What days does Weregeek update now?

    Also, hope Mark recovers soon.

    Posted April 27th, 2019 at 9:50 am
  38. Antheridium Says:

    Also: Thank you Doc. I have no need to comment further on Mark because you’ve said everything I would like to. (Though I still think Joel is the person Mark should talk it out with.)

    Posted April 27th, 2019 at 10:45 am
  39. Never Says:

    Hmm, I’m still wondering why the hell Ravenna chose this as a good location for her to introduce her primary to Mark and Dustin, she knows that they won’t be able to interact or really talk so there was no real way for them to get to know each other, instead it almost casts both Mark and Dustin in roles of performers for their amusement rather than partners, which might be going through Mark’s head too.

    Also was it weird that she prioritised introducing him to Abbie in the limited amount of OOC time than two other people she is a relationship with?

    Note, Mark is still behaving badly in this situation and lashing out, however this is not an ideal situation for a first meeting and that should be laid at Ravenna’s feet here as she is the one who set this up, so maybe there’s enough blame to come around.

    Posted April 27th, 2019 at 2:36 pm
  40. Guest Says:

    I’m the kind of person that when I’m angry or upset I either need to be alone or I need to rant about the issue. Which really depends on what the issue is and who is available at the time. If its a person that I’m angry at though I almost always need to rant about what they did to upset me.
    I’m pretty sure that what Mark needs right now is a good rant to blow off steam and a good friend that’s content to sit there and listen to it without offering more than acknowledgements that they’re listening. Dealing with the feelings can come later, for now they just need to be gotten out or they’ll fester.
    I get why Mark’s jealous. He probably didn’t really understand what he was really getting into when the idea was proposed. He hadn’t even met Damien until now despite the fact that Damien is Ravenia’s primary. If this were handled right from the beginning the four of them would have sat down and discussed the relationship a long time ago to iron things out and find an arrangement that everybody is okay with.
    Mark’s worry over what Ravenia and Damien are whispering about during the game isn’t exactly unfounded. Before the game started the two of them took a moment to whisper about Mark when he blushed. Which brings up another thing, it’s been made abundantly clear that Ravenia has been telling Damien about Mark and Dustin, down to their quirks and brands of humor, but clearly she didn’t tell Mark nearly enough about Damien. Maybe she just wasn’t thinking, but still, that lack of the same sort of sharing makes it seem like she doesn’t consider Mark as much her boyfriend as Damien. The jealousy is well founded and Mark has every right to be upset.
    I applaud Abby for trying to help, but even she’s going about it all wrong. She could have waited to talk to Mark about it after game and instead engaged him more in character to keep his mind off of the problem. Insisting he take a break despite his protests and then calling in Katie to get Mark to leave was a bad move that left him alone with his jealousy. Jealousy, especially well founded jealousy, just builds and grows the longer you’re left alone to think about it. Sending Dustin in was a mistake. It probably wasn’t his intention, but his whole lecture sounded like he was invalidating Mark’s feelings. And telling an angry person to calm down is basically inviting them to get even more angry. Sara, Darren or even Joel would have been a better choice. Somebody That will let him rant his feelings out and somebody that hasn’t already upset him.
    Going back to the game and pretending the issue doesn’t exist even though they now know what it is is yet another bad move, at least for their friendship. It was illustrated that they could hear Mark shouting through the door, so they know what’s wrong. It may be good for them to stop thinking about Mark for now, but it’s definitely not good for Mark and if it affects their friendship or leads to Mark distancing himself from them its not going to be so good for them anymore. If I were Mark and my friends abandoned me in my time of need to have fun instead I’d start looking for better friends and I’d be bitter about it for years.
    these guys are just making one big mistake after another…

    Posted April 27th, 2019 at 7:52 pm
  41. Aita Says:

    Kicking Mark to the OOC room wasn’t just for *his* benefit, it was to fix the game, which involves everyone, and is often needed. The show must go on, and all that.

    His emotions; his responsibility. That the others tried to help and were abused for it is another thing from that, and good on them, helping in their various ways (Abbie has roughly no ability to deal with the *content* of his problem, and Dustin is analytical while Mark is emotional.) They could soothe him, perhaps, but that’s not really the goal for any of them, nor do I believe it should be, as putting problems off is usually unhealthy.

    Text Ravenna, and tell her he needs to talk because he’s insecure. Get them away from the game (to avoid guilt for being a debbie downer after whatever resolution is met), and let them sort their shit. The group will understand his absence, but his abuse is another topic.

    Nep’s got it right.

    Posted April 28th, 2019 at 9:09 am
  42. I think the group dynamics need to be looked at by the group.

    A gaming group that I am in had a blow-up on Saturday. Part of it involved a new member (who has had issues before) actually trying to turn the group against me. Angry people tend to be less honest. Passive-aggressive people can be deadly when there are people who do not see that behaviour for what it is. It ended up afterward with the new member being expelled. It was done by phone and I witnessed the expeller’s side. There was little satisfaction in it for me. It was a weary relief with much more weariness than relief.

    My group could have been destroyed. The same thing could happen here.

    Posted April 29th, 2019 at 2:50 pm
  43. Sylana Motara Says:

    Totally agree with Never. This was far from the best place to introduce Damien. Club? Sure! Dinner out? Fantastic. Movie night at Ravenia’s? Brilliant. A LARP where everyone’s in character and is supposed to pretend you don’t exist? Not the greatest idea for introducing someone. I can also guess why he decided not to skip, even though he already knew he was jealous. It’s an innate fear of giving in to his fear, if that makes sense. He’s already said he’s super shy and has a hard time reaching out to people. Yes, he’s made great strides in conquering that, but I think this situation hit just about every button he has. Deep down, he knows he’s in the wrong on this, but his insecurities are all popping up and yelling “You’re not good enough””You aren’t special” “She’ll never look at you that way”, and it’s more than his rather fragile self-esteem can take right this moment. Frankly, I doubt anyone can help him at just this moment. He needs time and space to get at least a tenuous grip on his emotions, and then a long sit-down with Ravenia to hash out exactly where he stands in this relationship, and if he feels it’s worth the internal conflict to continue.

    Posted May 3rd, 2019 at 1:59 am
  44. Hagar Says:

    I have noticed numerous arguments for what the the gang should do about Mark’s current situation, including variations on both the themes that they should leave him alone to sort things out for himself, and that one or more of the other characters should be in the room with Mark in some capacity (there have been several specific options put forth for what that capacity should be).

    I have also observed the gang’s attempts to help him in-comic, which by any large have not yielded productive results, at least not in the immediate/short term.

    I have not, however, noticed anyone asking Mark what he would like from his friends right now (or proposing this course of action). Ie:

    First:
    “Mark, would you prefer to be alone right now, or would you like company?”

    Then:
    [If Mark says he would like to be alone]: “Okay. If you change your mind, just say the word.”
    [If Mark says he wants company]: Okay. Do you want me to stay, or is there someone else you’d like me to go find for you?

    I think that is not only the simplest way to resolve things, but also the approach that is most respectful to Mark and likeliest to yield the kind of support that works best for Mark (whatever that looks like for him personally).

    Posted May 3rd, 2019 at 5:11 am
  45. As a follow-up, the member of my group whose home we were meeting at called it quits. I am now trying to reconstitute the group.

    Posted May 4th, 2019 at 9:33 pm
  46. Hagar, I thought I had posted something to the effect that you did. Yes, I very much agree with you. Trying to enforce one’s idea of a solution on someone under stress is not likely to work. I have had that happen to me recently. No, it is not that group I mentioned; life have been overly stressful lately.

    Posted May 5th, 2019 at 9:57 pm